Why don't we just regulate any Internet-connected device? When you purchase one, you register your name and address and are given the IP address in return.
Then, we can simply look up the physical address of the IP address holder.
I know you're just sarcastic trolling, but since your post seems to be generating some discussion without anyone pointing out the technical implications on a technical forum...
We already do this, but it's called the MAC address. And it can be used to trace back the piece of hardware to the purchaser.
Unfortunately it can't solve the problem for innumerable reasons. For one, it turns out to be pointless to route internet packets or police raids to the location of my computer, knowing it has a unique number (currently the MAC) that can identify it as made in China and sold in Virginia...Better to use the dynamically assigned address (currently IP) of my home router which, with a call to Comcast, can give you my physical address in Hawaii.
Of course that physical address might serve any of my neighbors, but then again my computer's MAC also serves any guest in my house that asks nicely to use my computer or anyone tech savy enough to clone it.
I'm not sure if you're trying to make a sarcastic analogy to gun registration or not, but if you are, they aren't quite the same, given that a gun is a physical object and an IP can change without the user knowing or being responsible for that change.
Haha nah, I didn't put those two together. I guess gun registry is a big topic in the states right now. I was just pretending to be a politician since that's the sort of response I feel they would come up with.
Then, we can simply look up the physical address of the IP address holder.